The Significance of Decision-Making: Steering Your Life with Purpose
Every decision we make counts. Whether big or small, the choices we make have a profound impact on the direction our lives take. Decisions should never be trivialized or left to chance, because each decision is important and crucial in steering us towards a purposeful path.
How many parents constantly make decisions for their children, or impose their choices even when their children become adults? They choose career paths for them or try to influence their decisions based on their own worldview, their own fears or what is familiar to them. Or they pick life partners for them in the misguided belief that it is their responsibility and often realize their own choices, hopes and aspirations through these decisions while the obedient child, now an adult without authority, slowly dies inside doing something that gives them no real joy!
Making decisions for someone else means that you do not trust them to live their lives. By doing so you are undermining their right to live!
A person cannot be considered an adult if they are unable to make their own life choices and take full responsibility for themselves.
Decisions are power. Decisions, both major and minor, are the building blocks of our existence. They are the conscious actions that shape our reality, making us the architects of our own destiny, the authors of the story of our lives. Every decision carries weight and power, like a rudder guiding a ship through stormy waters and they should never be underestimated, nor left in the hands of someone else.
Why would you let someone else drive your life, make your choices for you and choose your destination for you? You are bound to land up where you don’t wish to be!
Each decision you make reflects your values, desires, and beliefs whether you are aware of it or not! Over time, your cumulative choices form the essence of who you are. Whether you choose to pursue a particular career, maintain a healthy lifestyle, or nurture relationships, these decisions collectively define your identity. Sometimes our decisions shape our identity as we slowly begin to accept that we are the kind of person based on the decisions we make on a regular basis. By consistently choosing to engage in a particular behaviour or lifestyle, and making it a habit, we begin to accept and embrace that aspect of ourselves, and it becomes an integral part of our identity.
Life is a journey, and decisions can be seen as the crossroads during this journey. Each choice you make, however tiny, determines the route you take. Major decisions, such as selecting a life partner or choosing a career, can have far-reaching consequences, charting the course of your life for years to come. This is why it is essential to be very clear about your destination, about what you truly hold important, and your priorities and values before defining your path.
Exercising the power of decision-making contributes to our personal growth. It challenges you to explore your potential, learn from mistakes, and evolve into a better version of yourself. The act of making choices, big or small, is a catalyst for self-improvement.
Once upon a time, I used to be okay with anything and everything because making decisions was tiring and I had rather limited energy. If friends asked me, ‘Which flavour of ice cream do you want?’ I would reply, ‘Any flavour will do.’ Choosing one among the variety of choices was mind-boggling and took more time, effort and energy than I had in a few minutes. It took me a while to realise that I always ended up with vanilla or strawberry and did not get to taste the other flavours. My friends would play it safe and get me what they felt would be generally okay for anyone. However, it was getting boring for me. The next time I surprised them by asking for butterscotch and I loved it. It made me want to explore all the flavours one by one and finally make my own decisions on ice cream. This little decision of choosing for myself led me to make bigger decisions on my own instead of letting others chart the course of my life.
It can be scary to choose and have the fear of being disappointed; it can be difficult at times to bear the consequences of our choices, but if we do not do it in the small things, we will not hone our decision-making muscles for the big things in life and be led astray by others, however, well-meaning.
Decisions require accountability. When you recognize the importance of your choices, you become responsible for the outcomes. Accountability promotes mindfulness in decision-making and encourages you to make choices aligned with your goals and values. Making your own decisions also means becoming fully responsible for yourself. You cannot then blame someone else for the consequences and this is the real power of conviction — choosing, deciding and fully facing all the consequences. It is the power of relying on the self.
Purpose is the North Star that guides our lives. Decisions play a pivotal role in aligning your actions with your purpose. By consciously making choices that resonate with your values and aspirations, you construct a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling. Think about the times that you have chosen something you truly did not want because of peer pressure or parental pressure. How did it make you feel inside? How satisfied were you despite the consequences of that decision?
To make decisions that truly steer your life towards purpose, mindfulness is key. Here are some strategies that can help you approach purposeful decision-making with intention, awareness and mindfulness:
Reflect on Your Core Values: Before making a decision, take time to reflect on your core values and get really clear on them. Clarity is power in the short term as well as the long term. Consider how each choice aligns with what matters most to you.
Learn to be Farsighted and Consider the Long-Term Impact: Slow down in life and think beyond immediate gratification. Assess how your decisions will impact your future, and whether they contribute to your long-term goals. Often we see just beyond our noses and ignore farsightedness because it is hazy and vague. Take time to look, reflect, ponder and consider the far-reaching implications of your decisions and then take inspired and aligned action.
Seek Input from those with Experience: Seek ideas, suggestions and advice from trusted mentors, friends, or professionals, especially for significant decisions. Multiple perspectives can provide valuable insights. However, do not take travel advice from those who have never left the comfort of their armchair!
Uncertainty is Part of the Process of Life: Understand that life does not follow a straight line and that not all decisions come with clear answers or definite guaranteed outcomes. Embracing uncertainty is itself a powerful choice that leads to growth and resilience.
In life, each and every decision is a brushstroke of colour that creates a unique masterpiece. Sometimes we cannot see the end result with clarity and that is okay. Things become clearer as we go along and we do get chances to rectify mistakes or start over again. That too is a decision! And by the way, not making a decision is a decision in itself which will keep you stagnant and stuck in life!
Whether you’re making a monumental choice or a seemingly trivial one, remember that each decision bears weight in shaping your destiny. By approaching decisions with mindfulness and a commitment to aligning them with your purpose, you become the masterful artist of your own life, creating a path that is purposeful and fulfilling.
As a mindfulness practitioner and life-design counsellor, I help clients focus on well-being and personal growth and make life choices that prioritize their mental and emotional health. This leads to personal freedom and independence allowing the person to blossom and manifest the life they deserve. Reach out if you require help and guidance.