Giving oneself Space and Grace
Have you ever missed an *important* appointment?
Did you forget to do something, you had said you would and as a consequence let someone down?
Have you failed to maintain a promise?
If yes, how did you feel in the above situations? What did you say to yourself? How did you handle it with the others involved?
Our lives are sometimes on a constant spin like the classic hamster wheel. Even when we prioritise and pare things down to the simple and manageable, the important and essential, being well hooked into the modern lifestyle can brings its force to bear upon us and things can temporarily spin out of sync.
Add to this mix, seasonal changes, time Zone changes and unexpected and continued periods of complete uncertainty and we have a recipe for something slipping through the cracks somewhere!
At times, during a busy or unstructured period, with constant changes on an already full schedule and between the ups and downs, highs and lows, I will upon rare occasions find myself awaken with a jolt in the middle of the night with a niggling thought of having forgotten something important. This usually causes me to go and check my agenda and the funny thing is that I, more often than not, do have the item well under control.
So, what is it that caused me to worry about having missed it?
It is the fact that in all the turmoil, my brain running on autopilot and overthinking mode did not register it.
This is why creating space for moments of peace and quiet during the day is so very important. It allows the brain time to move from overdrive into states of restfulness and helps remove toxins and regenerate neural connections.
Sometimes, it does happen that I did actually miss the appointment/event and the first reaction is that of feeling terrible and guilt for the forgetfulness. However, it isn’t where I choose to remain because I have come to understand that it does not serve me. I have learned to accept my imperfect human failings, my forgetting, my not being an ace at everything at all moments.
Instead, I work through it, apologise, create new appointments, move on and continue.
The demands on our time and energy can be overwhelming during certain periods, there are unforeseen circumstances and naughty imps ready to throw a wrench into the works,, distractions are always knocking from all sides, ready to slide in and take control at a moment’s weakness. Staying in a state of feeling bad, embarrassed, apologetic isn’t going to help matters any more, it is best to accept that we are liable to mess up, every now and then, wipe up the mess, and move on.
This is actually extending oneself grace, as we would extend it to others, forgiving the mistakes and the lapses, empowering oneself to learn the lesson, grow through the situation, and proceed.
It means letting go of perfection and embracing the fallible and innate humanness.
- What area of your life do you need to examine, forgive the imperfections and allow Grace into?